An overwhelming 48% of American parents confess that they experience intense levels of stress every day. This figure stands in stark contrast to the 26% of stress reported by adults who are not parents. These startling statistics were part of a recent advisory issued by the U.S. Surgeon General regarding the mental health and wellbeing of parents across the nation.
This worrying trend aligns with research conducted by the site What to Expect. This study revealed that slightly over two-thirds of mothers, approximately 68%, grapple with anxiety regularly. Additionally, mothers from the Gen Z demographic seem to be struggling even more, with 79% expressing their daily battle with anxiety.
Compared to the joy and fulfillment that is often associated with parenting, these figures paint a harsher, more nerve-wracking reality for many parents. The number of parents feeling overwhelmed by stress has been steadily increasing over the years, a trend that necessitated the Surgeon General to release a new advisory regarding the mental health and wellbeing of parents.
'We seriously underestimate how parents are doing right now and the struggles that they're going through,' observed U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy. He identified a range of stressors that beleaguer modern parents including the financial implications of raising a child, protecting them against threats such as social media and gun violence, and an alarming increase in loneliness among parents.
Dr. Murthy encouraged parents not to shy away from sharing their struggles, in order to normalize these challenges. Yet, he acknowledged that the burden to find solutions for their own mental health issues should not rest solely on parents. His advisory urged the government to develop improved policies that would enhance access to benefits such as paid leave, affording childcare and mental health services.
The advisory also implored employers and community organizations to extend more flexibility to parents. It further proposed that family and friends step in to provide support, especially since many parents find themselves without the communal support of a 'village'. 'We need to really look at parenting as a team sport,' Dr. Murthy advised. 'This isn't something any of us can do on our own.'
Above and beyond the advisory, independent research from What to Expect also shed light on the mental health predicament that many parents presently face. The survey indicated that a staggering 75% of mothers felt they lacked adequate support in the form of a 'village'.
In addition to this, the study illuminated the impact this shortcoming has on these mothers. It suggested that 68% of them were suffering from stress, with 35% labeling their anxiety as moderate to severe. Similarly, mothers belonging to Gen Z reported high levels of anxiety as 79% of them stated they were dealing with this issue. This could be attributable in part to the 83% of Gen Z mothers who felt pressured to present an image of perfect parenthood.
The research also examined the principal stressors afflicting mothers. Safety, which includes concerns about online and school safety emerged as a key issue. Other concerns were a lack of personal time for rest or to balance work and family life, financial worries about inflation, the cost of raising a child and planning for the future. Parents also showed concern for their child's emotional and social health as well as their education.
Reflecting on his own experience of raising two children, Dr. Murthy confessed that he initially assumed that parenthood was a blissful experience. He candidly revealed that his son struggled with feeding and sleep, and that he found it challenging to ask for help or even acknowledge that other parents might too, be dealing with similar issues. 'We want to try to peel back some of these layers of shame and guilt and stigma that make too many parents feel like they can't talk about their struggles because they're admitting to being a bad parent,' remarked Dr. Murthy.
Dr. Murthy's statement is something many parents can relate to. 'I feel like maybe I'm royally screwing up because some people seem to have it all together,' admits one anxious parent. 'I'm constantly feeling overwhelmed no matter how much help I get.'
Experts like Shari Lusskin, a perinatal psychiatrist at Mount Sinai Medical Center, attempt to reassure struggling parents like these. Lusskin reiterates the universal struggle of parenting and insists that perfection is not necessary. 'You don't have to be perfect – you have to be good enough. Take what people say under advisement and figure out which approach works best for you and your family. But there is no perfect,' advises Lusskin.
More about the U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory can be found on their official website. And if you're a parent in need of immediate support, you can reach out to the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline. This free, 24/7 hotline offers real-time, confidential support from trained professional counselors.
Study Methodology
The data from What to Expect was derived from a survey conducted in October 2022 titled Motherhood Matrix Study. The survey assessed the responses of 3,232 women in the US who were either pregnant or had a child aged 0 to 8 years old.